Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)

Here's a look at a classic movie that turns 30 this year!

Robert Zemeckis’s hit comedy Who Framed Roger Rabbit turns 30 this year. While it was a Disney production, this film was a hit in large part because it gave people the once-in-a-lifetime chance to see classic cartoon characters such as Mickey Mouse and Bugs Bunny share the screen. The title character (voiced by Charles Fleischer) would also become as beloved as Mickey and Bugs, reappearing in a few short animated films in the years since this film’s release. The added draw of having animated characters interact with humans was another plus to this movie.

The year is 1947 and downtrodden private detective Eddie Valiant (Bob Hoskins) is summoned to Maroon Cartoon Studios by its head R.K. Maroon (Alan Tilvern). Eddie goes to Maroon’s office after being annoyed during the filming of “Somethin’s Cookin'”, in which Roger makes a mess of things while babysitting for Baby Herman. The director gets pissed with Roger after the latter takes a refrigerator to the head for the 23rd time and seeing birds rather than stars as scripted. This delay pisses off Baby Herman as well, causing him to use his normal chain-smoking voice to take a load off in his trailer while they reset.

In his office, Maroon tells Eddie that Roger’s wife Jessica is rumored to be involved with Marvin Acme, the owner of both the Acme Corporation (as Wile E. Coyote will tell you) and Toontown, where all the cartoon characters, or “Toons” as they are called, live. Eddie agrees to get some photographic evidence for the whopping fee of $100 as Maroon allows him to indulge in his love for the booze he has near his desk, while we see more classic characters such as Dumbo hanging out in Maroon’s back lot.

With Maroon’s $50 advance, Eddie heads to a nearby bar run by his girlfriend Dolores (Joanna Cassidy). He gives her the $50, which Dolores needs for business reasons, with the promise that the rest is coming and asks for her camera. She notes that the check is from Maroon, prompting the local bar rat Angelo to poke fun at the fact that Eddie is known for helping out toons. This pisses Eddie off enough to smack Angelo’s face into the bar before bolting. Dolores (who obviously hates Angelo too, as she doesn’t bother asking if he’s okay) explains that Eddie’s brother Teddy was killed by a toon.

That night, Eddie goes to the Ink and Paint Club, where Jessica sings. He gains entry after giving the password (“Walt sent me”) to the huge, humorless tuxedo-clad ape bouncer. On stage, we see Donald Duck and Daffy Duck pissing each other off while paying pianos. This leads to them trying to blow each other up to the applause of the audience. Making his way to one of the tables, Eddie gets scotch with rocks in his glass (as he had told a penguin waiter he wanted scotch on the rocks) and meets Acme (Stubby Kaye) when the latter tries out his new invisible ink pen by spraying some on Eddie’s suit.

After Eddie briefly catches up with Betty Boop, all the guys get excited as Jessica (Kathleen Turner) appears onstage for her number. Eddie’s eyes practically pop out when he sees she’s… well, doesn’t seem to be Roger’s type, as she gives Eddie, Acme, and the other guys in the audience a reason to love being alive.

Acme, followed by Eddie, goes to Jessica’s dressing room after her performance. When Eddie looks though the keyhole, the ape angrily tosses him out. So Eddie then makes his way to the window of Jessica’s room. He begins snapping away before becoming startled at what’s transpiring inside.

In Maroon’s office, both Roger and Maroon are equally taken aback, as it’s revealed that Eddie caught Jessica and Acme… playing patty-cake! Maroon offers Roger a drink, although it doesn’t help much as it briefly makes Roger crazy enough to smash up the office. Eddie and Maroon tell Roger that there are other fish in the sea, but Roger will have none of it and angrily breaks out of the office and into the night.

As Roger sits in an alley, wallowing in self-pity, Eddie returns to his office and smiles at the other pictures that were in the camera. These show him and Dolores enjoying themselves on a beach. But Eddie becomes sad when we see that his late brother was also on this trip. He glances over at his brother’s now-empty desk and drinks himself to sleep. He’s woken up the next day by an old acquaintance from the police force who informs him that Roger killed Acme during the night.

They head to the factory where the murder took place, and we see a chalk outline showing that Acme had a safe dropped on his head, along with paint supposedly from Roger’s gloves on the rope used for the killing. This factory has other toon-related packages, once of which breaks, causing animated shoes to briefly break out. In the confusion, Eddie spots something on the floor, but he’s stopped from collecting it by Judge Doom (Christopher Lloyd), the superior court judge of Toontown. Eddie briefly gets a chuckle when he demonstrates that the item was Acme’s hand buzzer, but Doom states that Maroon told him about how pissed off Roger was the previous night. He also assures Eddie and the police that he’ll find Roger with the help of the bumbling cartoon weasels in his employ. I guess Kirk blew up almost all the Klingons that worked for him, so Doom had to get help somewhere.

Doom further illustrates how he’ll get Roger when he introduces Eddie to his special concoction: Dip, a toxic combo of turpentine, acetone, and benzene which can do what safes, fridges and other dangerous objects cannot: kill toons. The judge gives a rather cruel demonstration by using it on one of the stray toon shoes from earlier.

Eddie heads back to his office, where he meets up with Baby Herman. The latter says that Roger wouldn’t kill anybody, and informs Eddie that Acme left a will, which has gone missing, that says that Toontown would go to the toons. After getting rid of Herman for saying that Eddie caused this mess with the pictures, Eddie gets a close-up of one of those pictures to reveal the will. Even scarier, he also finds Roger in his bed when he attempts to get some sleep. Roger tells him he needed a place to hide and assures him that nobody knows where he’s at—except the numerous people he asked for directions to Eddie’s office. He pisses off Eddie further with his goofing off by shackling them together in handcuffs that Eddie doesn’t have the keys for (of course). That’s when the weasels arrive, and Eddie hides Roger in some dishwater before they break in. After they leave, the duo heads for Dolores’s bar, where Roger temporarily hides after angering Eddie again when he easily slides out of the cuffs while Eddie tries to saw them off.

Jessica arrives at Eddie’s office as he finishes business in his bathroom (oh, boy). She tells him that Maroon blackmailed her into playing patty-cake with Acme by threatening Roger’s career. She departs as a pissed-off Dolores comes in and rips off the cartoon lip print Jessica planted on Eddie’s cheek. He finishes dressing, and with Jessica watching nearby, catches up with Dolores, who informs him that a company called Cloverleaf, which just bought L.A.’s Railway, is on the cusp of owning Toontown without Acme’s will saying otherwise.

But they realize that Roger has come out of hiding and is entertaining the bar’s patrons. This only draws the attention of Doom and his weasels. Eddie and Roger hide while Dolores covers for them, but Doom flushes Roger out by continuously tapping the “shave and a haircut” tune. Just as Roger is about to get dipped, Eddie convinces Doom to give him one last drink, which naturally makes Roger go bonkers, giving him and Eddie time to escape in a toon taxicab named Benny, who was arrested by the weasels for driving on a sidewalk.

After another brush with the weasels, Benny takes them to a movie theater. After Roger enjoys a short with Goofy, Eddie states that his downbeat mood was the result of his brother’s death. This makes Roger sad, saying he can see why Eddie hates him, but Eddie grudgingly assures him he doesn’t. Dolores meets up with them and they leave, but not before Eddie catches a newsreel saying that Maroon has made a deal with Cloverleaf.

This prompts him to return to Maroon’s office with a scared Roger in tow. Eddie tells him to keep an eye out and beep the horn if there’s trouble, but alas Roger is knocked out with a frying pan and dragged off just as Eddie goes inside. We see that Jessica is the one who KO’ed Roger (how romantic) and she tosses him into the trunk of her car. Eddie confronts an agitated Maroon, whom he manages to get the drop on. Maroon says that he wanted to blackmail Acme in order to secure the deal with Cloverleaf, but didn’t think murder would enter the equation. But he doesn’t say anything else as he’s shot to death by an unseen assailant holding a pistol through the office window. Eddie looks outside the window to see Jessica fleeing.

Eddie races to his car, and not finding Roger, attempts to pursue. This leads to the tunnel that’s the entrance to Toontown. He pauses before going farther and pulls out a special pistol with toon bullets, one of which he uses to destroy his remaining booze. Sure enough, Eddie enters to see himself surrounded by a cartoon world, and then promptly crashes his car into a cartoon building.

He traces Jessica to one of the high floors of a building (with Droopy at the controls of the elevator that takes him there), only to see that it’s not Jessica, but a crazed man-hungry toon. Eddie escapes, only to fall out of the incredibly high skyscraper. He briefly holds onto an extending pole, only to lose his grip thanks to Tweety thinking his fingers are “piggies”, and where’s Sylvester when you need him? Falling farther, he sees Mickey and Bugs with parachutes. When Eddie asks if they have a spare, Bugs says he does but isn’t sure if Eddie wants it. Mickey tells Bugs to cut the guy a break and they parachute away just as Eddie realizes the spare is actually a spare tire.

Fortunately (or not), the crazed toon catches him, prompting him to run some more. Thankfully, Eddie gets rid of her after he tosses the divider of the road she’s running on into a nearby wall.

Eddie finds Jessica in an alley, pistol aimed in his direction. But her shot takes out the shadow of someone behind him, who turns out to be Doom, whom Jessica says is the one who killed Maroon. Eddie fires at Doom but the other toon bullets take off in the opposite direction, prompting Eddie to refer to them as dum-dums. They find that Roger has broken out of the trunk that his wife put him in and made off in Eddie’s car. But they’re able to get away from the approaching weasels thanks to Benny. As they make a break for it, Jessica says that Acme told her that Doom was obsessed with getting Toontown and gave her his will for safekeeping, but all she found was a blank piece of paper, which Roger later used to write her a love letter.

Benny’s exit from Toontown proves harsh as Doom spills some dip on the road, burning out his tires. The judge makes off with Eddie and Jessica. At his hideout, Doom reveals to them that he owns Cloverleaf and that he plans to destroy Toontown with a machine that sprays out dip in order to make way for a freeway, and that people won’t have the option of using the Railway because he plans to get rid of it. Roger finds Benny, who painfully takes him to their hideout before getting the cops. Roger attempts to save his pal and his love, but gets knocked out, giving him those stars that eluded him earlier. As the Rabbits are hung up and ready to be dipped, Doom slips, causing the weasels to laugh. His statement that their laughter will kill them prompts Eddie to try to make them laugh themselves to death. They do just that, but Doom stops him from freeing Roger and Jessica. Their fight ends with Doom getting smashed by a steamroller, but he survives because he himself is a toon, specifically the one that killed Eddie’s brother. They fight some more before Eddie manages to get Doom’s machine to spray him with dip. He frees Roger and Jessica just as Doom’s machine enters Toontown and is destroyed by a passing train.

After Dolores, Benny, other toons, and the cops arrive, Eddie reveals Doom’s culpability in the matter and realizes that Roger wrote his love letter on Acme’s will, which was written with his disappearing-reappearing ink. The film ends with the toons celebrating that they now own Toontown, with both Porky Pig and Tinkerbell saying goodbye in their famous ways.

The movie itself was adapted from the 1981 novel Who Censored Roger Rabbit? That book has some notable differences with the book. For instance, instead of Mickey and Bugs teaming up, we see comic strip characters like Beetle Bailey and Snoopy in the novel.

Obviously, the big draw for this film was seeing cartoon characters and people interact. The good news is that both Hoskins and Cassidy are fun and likable in their roles, and Lloyd is suitably scary. I also always got a kick out of the fact that Donald and Daffy hate each other’s guts, while Mickey and Bugs seem to get along fine. For a contrast, check out Cool World, which came out four years later. Both the animated and flesh and blood people in that film just give the viewer a headache from beginning to end.

Naturally, the success of this film brought about talk of a sequel. Alas, we have yet to actually see one, and while this film is beloved, I have doubts we will. For one thing, Hoskins died in 2014. But animation itself has make great strides in the years since this film. So much so that special effects in live-action films done in the manner here are basically the norm now. Hence, mixing live-action and animation in this manner is not quite viewed as the awesome feat it once was.

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman: The Arc From Hell

This is a look at the five-episode arc which cost Lois & Clark basically all its fans.

As I noted in my previous recap, the third season of Lois & Clark began promisingly by surprising the viewers in the best possible way. In this case, it was Lois responding to Clark’s marriage proposal by revealing that she knew he and Superman were the same person. The following episodes of this season would present them being a couple having romantic moments in between fighting bad guys. At the same time, they would both do some soul-searching and make mistakes, as all couples basically do. This would all culminate in the lovely moment in the season’s seventh episode “Ultra Woman”. In this story, villains inadvertently give Clark’s superpowers to Lois, prompting her to assume the superhero guise of the title. Of course, Clark gets his powers back and the villains are put away, but the story ends with Lois stating that the experience has only increased her love for Clark, which leads to her proposing to him, which he accepts.

This probably represented the series at its highest point, in that it highlighted that the show was about the two title characters and the bond they were developing. The love for this show would keep going as our lovebirds would spend the next few episodes fighting bad guys while planning their wedding. That wedding was, appropriately enough, set to air on the week of Valentine’s Day in 1996. The buzz for it was everywhere, especially online, which was still a relatively new medium at that point. All of the staff at ABC even got wedding invitations. The trailers for the episode, entitled “I Now Pronounce You…” looked promising, so its place as one of the great moments in TV history was all but assured.

As it turned out, the finished product would go down in TV history, but not as a great moment, leading to a five-episode arc fans would call “the Arc from Hell”, although I personally call it “the Real Reason Lois & Clark Got Cancelled”. Let’s take a brief look at that episode and the four that followed and see why they turned what began as the show’s most loved season into its most hated.

Season 3, Episode 15: “I Now Pronounce You…”

With their wedding just days away, Lois calls Clark to express her concerns. A false alarm by a delivery man doesn’t set her mind at ease when said delivery turns out to be dead flowers, along with a later delivery that’s a smashed cake. In addition, troubles with the guests’ hotel arrangements prompt her to ask Perry if there’s a story she and Clark can work on to keep their minds focused on something else.

Perry says that there have been reports of rare frogs being stolen from pet shops recently. When one of the burglars is ID’ed as a Secret Service agent, our heroes realize that the visiting US President (Fred Willard) could be a potential target. Lois and Clark discover that the frogs are actually being used as food for special clones (I suppose there are some fans who, at this point, already knew where this was heading) designed by a scientist named Dr. Issac Mamba (Tony Curtis), who once worked for Lex Luthor.

While Lois is trying to make up with her mom (Beverly Garland), one of the clones attempts to abduct them. Lois subdues him and discovers his connection to Luthor. This prompts her to go to the President to warn him, but alas, Mamba arrives with the news that the President is a clone, and unbeknownst to Lois, has just faxed off a pardon for Luthor. Fortunately, Superman arrives just in time to save Lois, imprison Mamba and the clones, and retrieve the real President, who was tied up in another part of the hotel he was staying at.

The episode concludes with the wedding between our heroes, but Lois is briefly called away beforehand to sign the marriage license. This is why the final scene ends with the revelation that Clark walked down the aisle with a clone.

(And to add insult to injury, this episode was dedicated to the memory of Superman co-creator Jerry Siegel, who passed away the previous month.)

Season 3, Episode 16: “Double Jeopardy”

With the much-hyped wedding episode having been revealed to be a shameless lie, one wonders how the series could possibly recover. Unfortunately, things would only get worse.

Picking up from the previous episode, Lois is taken somewhere (the episode doesn’t know, so why should we?) and the guy who dragged her away to sign the marriage license turns out to be Luthor. He announces that he plans to take Lois to the Alps, and since they came close to walking down the aisle at the end of the first season, he’s confident Lois will fall in love with him.

At the same time, Clark is dumbfounded when the Lois clone turns out to not be in a romantic mood. But her mood quickly changes when she learns that she’s now Mrs. Superman. This prompts her to basically force Luthor to give her special treats like all the cable TV channels if he wants her to withdraw millions of dollars he deposited in Lois’s name way back when. Lois uses this to attempt an escape, but her efforts are cut short when she hits her head, giving her amnesia. She quickly gets out of town with the help of a passing truck driver. Lois says her name is “Wanda Detroit”, and with the driver’s help, she makes it to a lounge on the other side of town where she becomes a popular singer.

Oh, and where did Lois get that name? In a previous scene, Jimmy finds out that Lois was writing a story on the side in which the main character is named Wanda and is torn between two men, one named Clark and another named Kent.

Clark eventually realizes that he married a clone and attempts to look for the real Lois. While the clone tracks her down, Luthor meets up with Clark and tells him that they need to work together to find Lois. Clark is rightfully suspicious, but Jimmy arrives and informs Clark that the truck driver called the Daily Planet, and also informs him about Lois’s story. Luthor clandestinely slips out, heading for the lounge with Clark in pursuit.

Lois manages to escape after Clark arrives, but she runs into the clone, who tries to kill her. Then Luthor shows up saying that he’s “Kent”, which Lois buys. At Luthor’s urging, Lois rejects a dumbfounded Clark before she and Luthor drive off together. So Luthor got the same info at the same time as Clark and he was able to instantly deduce that Lois had amnesia, but Clark didn’t? The only thing worse than this is that this arc still has three episodes left.

Season 3, Episode 17: “Seconds”

Superman, sad at how stupid he was at the previous episode’s end (not that I blame him) is contacted by Luthor. Their little chat ends with them declaring war on each other over Lois, just as Luthor blows up a nearby building.

But Luthor is still concerned that Lois could regain her memory, so he has men break into a lab to get special cloned bodies that Mamba made for them to transfer their brains into. Meanwhile, the Lois clone informs Clark about the money Luthor wanted to withdraw, and asks Clark why she can’t just be with him. He respectfully tells her why, but she still agrees to go to the bank with him to get the money and thus drive Luthor out. Once there, Luthor sends out a special light that blinds everyone except Clark, who feigns blindness of course. Luthor also makes off with the clone, and as payback for her betrayal, informs her that her limited lifespan will cause her to die in just a few days. Desperate for more life, the clone informs Luthor that Clark is Superman. This delights Luthor, but (as he’s a villain and all) he says that she’s still going to die and leaves her to agonize over it.

The clone informs Clark of this, but promises to make amends. But wouldn’t you know it, Luthor arrives at Clark’s place (I guess Clark’s super-hearing had an off day) and temporarily weakens him with a weapon that can destroy trash cans, which some goofball in an alley gave him. He then gloats to Clark about how he’ll make his life a living hell now that he knows he’s Superman, and then he makes off with Martha.

Returning to his hideout, Luthor tells Lois that Superman savagely beat him up and says she must kill him. When the Man of Steel arrives, however, Lois can’t bring herself to do it, causing an impatient Lex to try. The clone frees Martha and intervenes and that goofy gun ends up killing both of them. But a piece of falling rock knocks Lois on the head as she, Martha, and Superman escape.

Okay, so Luthor dies… again. One would think that it would mean an end to this bullshit that already ran two episodes too long, but no, this one ends with Lois at the hospital still suffering from amnesia.

Season 3, Episode 18: “Forget Me Not”

It’s probably at this point in the arc where the fans basically said “Fuck this show!” and the show was basically telling them the same. Lois checks into a clinic to regain her memory, but wouldn’t you know it, the doctor assigned to her, Maxwell Deter (Larry Poindexter) has the hots for her and bans Clark from seeing her as she goes through treatment. You’d think this kind of shady behavior could cost Deter his medical license, but logic obviously has no place in this arc.

There’s also a subplot about how Deter’s colleague Dr. Elias Mendenhall (Charles Cioffi) is using some of the patients in the facility as assassins. When he adds Lois to the list with Perry as her target, Clark leaps into action.

But like the previous three episodes, this one ends on a sour note. Lois tells Clark that she’s getting back into the swing of things, but this doesn’t include her relationship with Clark, and she’s in love with Deter now.

Season 3, Episode 19: “Oedipus Wrecks”

This misguided crap finally ends with this episode. Clark is getting more and more pissed at Deter. The good news for Clark, ironically, arrives in the form of this episode’s criminal, Hermiker Johnson (Daniel Roebuck), the younger brother of a criminal from Lois and Clark’s past. He’s invented a machine that can temporarily make people goofy enough to do his bidding. Despite Deter’s attempts to keep Lois for himself, this machine brings back memories for her every time it’s used. Eventually, this makes Lois remember her love for Clark and this whole godawful affair ends with her punching Deter out before she and Clark embrace in the night sky.

In fairness, the original intention was to have Lois and Clark officially walk down the aisle, but those plans were temporarily shelved when DC Comics announced their own plans for a wedding in the comics the following fall.

However, this doesn’t excuse how pitifully written this whole fiasco was. Lex Luthor’s return turned him into another hammy, generic villain, and his discovery of Clark’s secret was just an assurance that he’d die again rather than a moment of great tension; at the time, my dad actually said that the show couldn’t let Luthor live now that he knows Clark’s secret. Stretching this out for two more episodes beyond this makes it understandable why many of the show’s fans gave up on it altogether. I myself kept watching just on the off-chance that the show could somehow redeem itself, like maybe making all this a bad dream. I think if any scenario called for Star Trek: Voyager‘s infamous reset button, it was this.

The season itself ended with a two-parter in which our lovebirds actually encounter other survivors from Krypton. They inform Clark that his presence is needed on their new homeworld to avoid impending civil war. The second part ends with Lois and Clark tearfully bidding each other farewell in order to save many lives. Yes, Lois and Clark are separated here as well, but this was done in a much more moving way than the five episodes discussed here. Hence, if the wedding had to be stalled, this was the way it should’ve been done.

Lois and Clark would walk down the aisle in the third episode of the following season, entitled “Swear to God, This Time We’re Not Kidding”. Putting aside the fact that that episode could’ve been better, the title may as well have been a reflection of how the fans felt, as they weren’t kidding when they stopped watching. So every subsequent episode could’ve been as magnificent as, say, Star Trek: The Next Generation‘s “The Inner Light” and it wouldn’t have mattered. Indeed, even episodes that were good, like “Sex, Lies, and Videotape” were unable to bring viewers back. Why? Because fans were unnecessarily lied to and had to go through two months and five episodes of tedium for nothing, which is why this quintet of episodes is viewed with the same level of infamy as The Star Wars Holiday Special.

If anything could be seen as snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, it’s the third season of Lois & Clark.

Be My Valentine, Charlie Brown (1975)

The trilogy of A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965), It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown (1967), and A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving are...